The Fantastic Suite Life Of Mine .

broken glass.

2010-07-05T17:38:00.000+08:00

Jay. In. Singapore.

Should I go? I'm stressing out, but now that I think about it, I don't know why. I mean, its not like I never met Jay in real life before. I know for a fact that he looks haggard (well, two years ago anyway)

But should I go? I need answers before Saturday. Anyone? Help me?

let's start with the eyes.

2010-06-17T09:24:00.001+08:00

You know when I start posts with my eyes it means that its probably gonna be a long weird post full of rubbish. You can choose to ignore this, or you can stick with me and read it. Doesn't really make a difference to me anyway.

So yes, basically for that long, dark duration when I stopped blogging, I was going around Singapore trying to figure out why the hell am I still living here. But really, all I wanted to know was why I am still living. Period.

I am not a true fan of Park Jaebum. Yes I'm using his stage name. okay sure I may be one of those with the most pictures of him, I may have picked him up at the airport, I may have bought some clothes of his, but in true reality, I.Am.Not.A.Jaebum.Fan.

Because hardcore fans always say that if their idol left, they would die. So far, only one fan committed suicide because of the Jaebum Departure. Is she the only true fan of his?

Enough about him. I don't want my life to be only about him.

I woke up to my find jeans discolored.

The color is so much lighter than when I first wore it. Forgot to tell my maid it was hand-wash only -.- Aish.

When to Novena Square 2 with Hanna and got muhself froyo cos I missed it too much. We were there for some K-Pop dance thing but turned up at the wrong time -.- And some weirdos told us to fill in some Korean Tourism survey. Like I said, WEIRDOS.

Some pictures from Serene's wedding at Sentosa. Uhh.. Amra (something like that) Hotel. Nice place. And the cupcakes are from her cousin's cafe, 2AM. I know.

At Marina with my cousin. DO NOT TRY STARBUCKS' LEMON HIBISCUS JUICE. It gave me a fucking headache. Service there wasn't good. Tsk.

This is the best way to use Omegle. Always arm yourself with a Post-It lest some dude flashes at you. And that happened to me too many times. There are some incredibly hot ones though.

My day out with Yunii.Went to Orchard the day before the flood. Got our froyo and went to Skate Park. I saw this gorgeous sweet amazing Australian (I think) sitting by his lonesome at the station. I hyperventilated cos he was just so hot. Guess I don't really dig Asians anymore.

I snuck my green tea soy latte and fruit cup into the library. But I didn't have to fear getting caught. The guy working at the cafe also happens to be the barista at Starbucks!

All in all, my life is lame.

hold your chin up, baby

2010-06-12T16:19:00.002+08:00

Okay yeah so Jay's back.

My Jay. My husband. My baby. My everything.

Why am I not so much as a fangirl for him anymore? I don't know why. I can't summon enough energy to squeal over him, write stories about him, I can't even sigh in the middle of the road and think about his smile. I guess I realized that the Jay now, the one posting YouTube videos and cheesing it for the fans, isn't the Jay I'm in love with. Yes, ultimately, he's still the same ol' Jay Park. But that certain spark in him is gone. The spark of passion? The spark of leadership? I sure as hell don't know.

Being a Jay fangirl is definitely not easy. I for one, had severe issues with his departure. But was it worth it? Was all the pain worth it? At that point it my life, yes. But now, I just don't know.

I once thought about how my life would be without Jay, without K-Pop, even. But truth it, I can't imagine life without them. No matter how hard I try to avoid it, it's always everywhere.

Sometimes, I can't run away.

sing me to sleep

2010-06-03T18:07:00.003+08:00

I have my future planned out. I never knew it would play such a big role in life. I thought I could spend my life working under my dad's company. But I realized that if I wanna be happy, I should get my shit straight and start planning my future.

My DREAM is to become a stylist. of course, that is still within my reach but like my dad said, the demand for stylists isn't that high. So I threw that dream away.

Reality is, my dad wants me to be a lawyer under corporate law. I guess that is possible. After all, I am in the school debate team and I'm a bitch. So adding those up, i have a pretty decent head start. To become a lawyer I need to aim for Junior College, not for Polytechnic, like I had originally planned. I have to maintain straight A's for all subjects and still manage my social, academic, and personal life. Furthermore, Junior College life is pretty damn competitive, and I have to cultivate the habits of self-studying.To become a lawyer, I have to get at least B3's for my General Papers, I have to take written exams and I have to go for interviews. Other help-outlets? Not a problem. I should be grateful to my mom and dad for having connections.

I aim to achieve a degree. Diplomas ain't gonna cut it. After JC, I will go to law school, or maybe Ivy League? If I start studying, I should make it. i am sure of it. Positive.

Why I set high standards for myself? Because I don't wanna end up like normal Malays. they almost never go after their dreams, and most end up fucked-up and go to jail anyway. Thank god thank god thank god I have Chinese/Indonesian/Arabian blood.

I hope I get scholarships. less expenses = more money for me to shop if I end up staying in Washington with my godmother.

Yeah I still think about being an Arts student every now and then. I can try applying for School of the Arts, but once again, like my daddy said, the demand for arts in Singapore is very little.

Sigh. I should start studying now. Wish me luck.

been real,
g d b a b y i s m.

Korean Folk Village

2010-04-04T22:13:00.002+08:00

I went on a student exchange program to Korea, Suwon to be exact during the March holidays. It was fun, although a bit too short. During my stay, my home stay family took me a lot of places, the shopping malls, the karaoke room, and also the Korean Folk Village.

The Korean Folk Village in Suwon was used in a lot of dramas because of its lovely scenery and olden settings. I was greeted by stares as I walked in, which was expected, since I was a foreigner, but the stares quickly turned into warm,welcoming smiles.

Koreans are such friendly people.

At the entrance,

We had to fill up this Korean traditional paper with our wishes and tie it around a rope. My wish was this:

No wonder he's not coming back.

Yes, to my utter amazement, there were cats in Korea.

I hate cats.

Mu super-cute Korean buddy's younger sister was trying to show me how the poor people (mostly farmers and peasants) in the past used things around them, like straw and twigs as a form of clothing etc.

We decided that we didn't want others to see her underwear, thus, the human version of the mosaic.Anyway, isn't she simply adorable???!!

My buddy (equally cute) showing how a simple thing like straw can be made into accessories and household items.

The amazingness is beyond me.

A Korean traditional game called 'Tuho'. basically, you have to aim the sticks into one of the hole, the center one being the one worth most points. Cool game.

Cotton weaving :D :D Apparently, when I was at the village, there was a drama filming going on. How lucky was I?!

I managed to get autographs and a picture taken with one of the cast.

Random selca (self-camera) shot while we were waiting for this show to start:

Stupid contacts made me look as if I wasn't looking at the camera. hmph.

It's a tightrope show! Somehow, while watching, I was reminded of one of my quotes in Supernova.

“Park Jay, is just like the tightrope guy in the circus. He wants everyone to believe his act is an exquisite art, when actually, all her wants is to make it all the way across the line” kekekeekeke.

Yeah he made it.

We then watched a Korean traditional Wedding (obviously staged. Poor actors, they have to get married for every single days of their lives)

after the wedding, we played on these huge swings.

biig taaaal swings. After the short break, we went for a looong break at the amusement park :D

And that concludes my short, but ohsoentertaining (since I wrote it) post on my trip to the Korean Folk Village, Suwon.

Thanks for reading cupcakes :D :D

like a star that loses its sparkle.

2010-02-07T21:42:00.002+08:00

Honestly, I'm tired.

I'm tired of waiting.
I'm tired of dragging myself through my shitty life.
I'm tired of hoping that the world would be the same again.

But most of all,

I'm just tired.

I mean, yes, I promised to myself that I would wait for him, wait for Jay to come back. But sometimes, promises can't be kept. I can't go on like this. I can't write stories about him just to show that I'm devoted. I've lost some hope, yes, and guess what?

I don't feel guilty.

Its just like something that gets rusty over the years.

You dont realize it until some time later, when it totally loses its shine.

I started waiting because I thought it was the best thing to do.

I'm starting to stop because of the same thing.

Ultimately, this is my life. Not Jay's, not Daniel's, not Lindsey's. I get to own it, run it and control the flow.

One thing my household has an abundance of:

Korean Strawberries.
Dried Mangoes.
Problems.

I'm just so tired of all of this.

Coy Grumble

2010-01-16T17:06:00.002+08:00

Guess who's back.
It's moi. Baddest female.

Or something like that anyway.

Just wanted to inform you guys that I'm not dead.
Not yet anyway. probably in a decade or so.

And yeah, whatever.

New song lyrics are out.

'He'll fade away.
Oh maybe he'll turn around
And come back some day.
Till then I'll pray.
He'll be here,
yeah, he'll be here
One day'

'Putting a Mrs. before your name
Filled the page with kisses
realized it's just a game.
We can't be together,
there's going to be so many disses,
so why don't you come and give me
some of your fame?'

That's How I Roll

2009-12-22T12:35:00.003+08:00

Decided that I'll be better off writing these type of things rather than writing suicidal letters. Right? Anyway, what happened over the past few days. Yawn. Let's see my purchases.

Yep, you guessed it. Fake nails. These were the nicest I could find. $5.90. Cheap huh. The glu sucks though. its basically super glue and I accidentally stuck Daniel's scissors together. Oh well, he deserved it anyway.

I got this scarf at half-price because I spent over ten dollars. It looks like some terrorist muffler they use to cover the face. Oh well.

I was going to buy a New Era cap at 77th Street, but the designs there are so.. eww. So I got this. A snow-cap. Muahhaaa. And because its over ten bucks, I got the scarf at half-price.

Mascara! Nice shit. It's glittery and.. well.. that's the whole point. It's glittery.

I hate brushes like this. But who the hell cares. I'm gonna bling my eyes up babe. and this is much easier for poking Daniel's eyes too.

My normal black Etude House mascara. As you can see,one of my lenses are out of place.

My beloved Princess Mirror. And my lens is still out of place. YAY MEEEEEEEEE.

Fail reflection picture.

With the glittery mascara! Okay, I admit, the brush really sucks.

After I touched up with black mascara. So.. its black again. Damnit

The eyeshadow that can double as a blush. At first, the shimmer seemed silver, but in the sun, its actually gold. How effing fucktastic is that??

Sort of my star purchase. I wore this from Woodlands all the way to Kallang. And OH! Basketball girlies, remember that malay teacher dude that accompanied us to one of our matches? The one Myzura kept annoying? The one that acted gung-ho while being the invigilator for our exams? HE WAS SITTING BESIDE ME AND MY FAKE EYELASHES. AND HIS GIRLFRIEND IS CHINESE.AND HE WAS WEARING HIP HOPPY KINNA CLOTHES. I was like.. ohgay.

Yes, I actually wore the false lashes for training. Daniel kept cracking up, so I whacked him on the butt with racket.

This racket, to be specific. Damn, I just HAD to listen to the chipmunk version of Heartbeat.

My expression when I found out that Frolicks pwns Yoguru. GAHHH. Ive got free coupons ~

green with JAYLOUSY yet?And yeahhhh, my hair's not that dry anymore. thanks david.

The lifts. How short do I look again? Very. Midget like. GAHHHH.

My dad's friend bought the Pikachu for me when he was in Taiwan. CHUUUU.

Yepps, the squash girl doens't drink Pocari or H Two O like normal girls. I drink Mountain Dew.

TANGLIN CLUB!!!!!!!!!!! KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. The tennis courts are HUGE k.

My future phone. I'm taking the one with the orange back. NO MORE PINK.

My highly Korean-influenced office. Sort of. Sharing it with my aunt >.<

The poster I got from buying the Korean magazine. And my artwork :D :D :D

Usually after a match I would go out and drink something Daniel left for me. He fucking left me this. So I sprayed it all over his bag. HA! Serve you right you gay.

I found this pamphlet when I was in KL. It looked perfectly normal.

Still normal right? When I looked to the left, I was like.. "OH SHIT"

THIS IS CONSPIRACY. FREE PUBLICITY. JYP SHOULD BE CONTACTED. MAKING USE OF KOREAN STARS WITHOUT A CONTRACT. TBJ NEARBY SHOULD BE INFORMED TOO. I was so pissed when I saw this. For those idiots, this is Yoo Bin from Wonder Girls. You know, the one with a manly voice. Yes, this is her. She's not supposed to be here. I saw Kim Tae Hee promoting Thai brand fake eyelashes too. What the hell.

I'm done here. New story is up. http://winglin.net/fanfic/gdbaby_tired Dont be fooled by the link. And anyone who wants to make a poster, go ahead. i wont bite. I'll just cut off your head. NOT.

Because You're That Star

2009-12-21T17:04:00.003+08:00

I know I know I haven't been updating much as of late. Those two posts below doesn't count because they're not really 'me'. If you know what I mean. Which you don't. I don't know what to say anymore. Honestly, I'm just tired. Each time I turn around, trouble's brewing. Some of them are caused by me, some of them aren't. Ever felt like you just wanna go to sleep without worrying about the next day?

Do you ever treasure those three seconds when you wake up blissfully clueless to the world around you? Before reality seeps into your brains and you're sucked into the whir pool all over again? Well, I do. Those three seconds are what stopped me from .. I don't know. Trying to kill myself by .. doing stuff. I've been treading carefully, afraid. one wrong step, and everything will come tumbling back down.

All over again.

I know, some of you naive ones actually think I'm leading a perfect life. Please, don't ever think that. Don't ever think that I'm some princess who just sits there, lording over everyone else as they face their problems. People forget that I'm a person too.

While they face their family problems,
I'm having a screaming fit with my parents.

While they save up money to buy a new wallet,
I resorted to other ways to get money.

Just so I could show others that I could be a way different person on the outside.

I admit, it was a mistake on my part too. I worked too hard to make sure people think I'm a perfect little bitch, to make sure that others would look at me and say, "I wished I was like her"

I'm just sick of all this shit.

Maybe it's finally time for me to step out of that jaded skin, and just be myself.

truthfully, I don't even know who I am anymore.

I'm serious.

Wonderwall.

2009-12-17T15:45:00.001+08:00

AAAAND yes, the baddest female is back with another update. It's gonna be totally random and all over the place, so please don't mind the mess. Why don't we start off this post with a Christmas song since it's the season to be sexy .. I meant jolly.

Nice song huh? Moving on to my fab purchases during the past few days. THEFACESHOP stuff first >.<

Lip & Eye Make-up Remover! Also known as wet tissues that are realy benificial to your complexion. When I'm lazy to wash my face when I get home, I take this little darling out and wipe all the gunk off my face! And it can even remove my water-proof mascara!

Celestial Light Eyeshadow in purple. I purchased another one in pink yesterday. At first I thought this color would be dark and would make me look like someone punched me in the eye, but surprisingly, no. It was not too sheer with a subtle hint of shimmer. I LIKE! And the pink one can also double up as a blusher. Just the eyeshadow is about $15.00. I suggest you get the eyeshadow+nail polish set for $17.00. Much more worth it!

Liquid eyeliner! I wanted to buy it in black but the girl, Evan, I think, said that the brown one would suit me and my purple lens better. So I bought it. And it's a nice, deep, chocolatey brown which looks not as gothic as when I heap black liner onto my eyes. It gives a more feminine, but equally fierce feel. Me likey!

Fake eyelashes!!!!!!!!!!!!!! For only $4.90 AND it comes with the glue! I asked the girl to put it on for me since I was such a noob. The women queing up at the cashier were all like.. "WOAH! SO NATURAL!" when I finished kekeke. Actually, there wasn't much different, since the eyelashes were as long as my own. they only looked thicker, but I like it nonetheless. This is how my eyes looked like:

My other purchases are mostly clothes and stuff so let's move on to THE STAR PURCHASE.

Who thinks its sexy raise their hands.

How cheap is that?!! AAAND it would totally match the 2ne1 style during I Don't Care. I tried seraching or dara's chunky necklaces but so far I can't see any. Heck, anyway, it has sort of a Miu Miu inspiration and the elegance of it is nice. And again, I bought it for only $17.90 ~~~~ let me try match it up with an outfit.. got it! Alexander Wang's white muscle tee, black Splendid Jersey harem pants AND black Miu Miu heels. Timeless chic I tell you. If only I was taller :(

My look for the day:

My contacts are from Freshkon. They're having a promotion, two colored contacts (monthly) for $63.00. One pair is usually $42.00, so it's a good purchase. I got mine in Sterling Gray (in the picture) and green. A few girls asked me where I got my hair bow from. Truthfully, I've had it since 2007. I got it from Minibits but they don't sell it anymore now. Pity. For those who can't really see the color of my contacts:

It DOES look a bit green. In real life, it looks abit blue too. Hmm. And I was using the pink eyeshadow from Celestial Light on my cheeks. Au naturale ~ And YES I KNOW my brows are messy. I am going to wax them again next week. My hair appointment with David is scheduled on the 30th so yay me. Let's look at Christmas trees!

ITS SNOWING BUBBLES!

We ate here >.< And that's me waiting in the car. Because I ALWAYS HAFTA WAIT.

My Sexy Back. Credits to D for snapping this :D

And of course, a day isn't a day in Kallang unless we jet down to Leisure Park for some yummy delicious FROYO!!!!!!!!!!!!! I got mine with mango, because Daniel said blueberries were sour. I was like..ain't that supposed to be raspberries? I got mangoes anyway.

So, yes, I enjoyed my weekend. And I'm off for another great one. Wait.. I'll be away. Aish.

You'll Always Be My Thunder

2009-12-12T13:07:00.007+08:00

ghjagjdhgdhjgjd

Yes, the new baddest female is back. And this time, she's the Queen of Burger King! ... Since I got so bored, let me share with you M&Ms some of my nail colors which I find absolutely ah-mazing. Kudos to beauty consultants at The Face Shop for helping me choose compatible colors that suits my skin ^~^ Well, without further ado, grab a drink, grab some snacks and enjoy the ride.

Let's start off with the neutrals. [P/S: Sorry for the horrible quality of the pictures, I ahd to resort to using my lousy Viewty]

dfffffffffffffffffffff

ddddddddddff

When I first started to use this color, I could hardly see it. It's a very subtle, light color which is good if you wanna aim for the French Aristrocat look. This is BR 805. So far, this is the only color that can be paired up with YL 02 -look below-

bbbbbbbbbbbbbbb

This is bought at random. I paired it with BR 805 to make the color stand out and look more 'bling' and classy without looking like a tramp or hussy or whatever you call it. Gold can either make it, or break it. For those newbies at nail colors, this color can be used sparingly, don't heap it all up.

bbcvvvvvvvvvvvvv

This is PK 110 . A very baby-ish pink that can be used if you wanna tone down your outfit. I have no problems with this color, only that it can make you look like you are trying to act cute. Which I am not. You can use a thicker coat to make the color pop out more, which i highly recommend if you're using an ambiguous color tone for your outfit, like gray. This would be a perfect color choice to make your outfit less boring.

llllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll

This color is PK 109. Somehow, I can totally imagine this color on CL [the REAL baddest female]. It would set off her tan very nicely and still manage to look very 2NE1-ish. I won't recommend this to those with snowy-white skin [cough-jay-cough] but if you DO want to try this color out, don't use it when you're wearing your Marchesa dress. Pair it up with a very androgynous look so you won't look so . . erm, well, look at those girls acting cute at Bugis and you'll know what I mean.

rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

This is by far, the only red tone I have. Which is weird, considering that red is one of my favorite colors. This is RD 303. I thought that the color would come out very nice and thick and dark but I was surprised to find the color quite light and the liquid itself was diluted. The color was runny and I didn't like it. So.. yeah, this one's a no-no.

ggggggggggggggggggg

This is RD 302. I find it weird that this color is under the 'red's category because when I used it, it was like a dark purple. Well.. it looks almost black in the picture but hey, go to any Face Shop outlet and check it out for yourself. I find this color very classy and it totally matches with neutral colors.

gggggggggg

This was also bought on a whim. I like weird colors, because they look funky >.GR 503. I have yet to try it out but if any of you already owns this color, take a pic of yourself with this and send it to me k ? :D

hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

This is part of their Celestial Light range. It's Celestial Light 01. I don't really fancy it as a base color because it looks sort of cheap. I'd much rather use it as a top coat.

kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk

I favor this color over the rest because its very grungy and matches the 'rock-star' look. This is BL 604. A good color to add to your own collection of nail polishes. The picture doesn't do it justice, sadly. Oh well. But trust me, this metallic color is really really really worth it.

mmmmmmmmmmmm

Although I boguht this for fun, I was surprised to find that the color makes my skin look a bit fairer. Maybe its because its bright and almost neon-like, but its an unusual color that is worth a try for all you fair-skinned people out there. I won't recommend this for those with very dark tans, but this color works well with slight tans too. And here is me with this color, BL 606 !!

tttttttttttttttt

And that marks the end of my post. Thank you for reading and if you have time, do comment.

GDBABYISM O9.

Coming to a closure.

2009-12-11T17:47:00.002+08:00

I have decided to make this more of a fashion blog than a 'what the fuck am I doing to my life' blog.

Look forward to fashion updates, especially on eye colors and nails. Oh and lots of Kate Spade.

Love,
Myung Hee.

P/s: You can follow me here:

http://plurk.com/gdbaby

http://me2day.net/djay

http://twitter.com/heartcubist

http://somelikeit-secret.tumblr.com

Ciao.

Take A Chance.

2009-12-04T08:49:00.003+08:00

Should I go away for good.

Or should I stay.

Should I face the music.

Or should I run away.

Should I start Fragile; The Last Piece

Or should I just get my ass out of writing aysap.

Choices, choices,choices.

Oh well.

mid-life crisis's always rock.

and they become even better when there's no one to stand by my side.

enjoy Christmas while I shrivel up and die.

will be edited.. never.

2009-12-02T09:51:00.002+08:00

Sheltering You From Rain

2009-11-24T15:43:00.002+08:00

Epiphany.
Enigmatic.

until my heart forgets to remember you.

The indelible you.
The smiling you.

Forever.

I got this from CHIA:

"Some people think holding on to people & things makes you strong.. but very often it's letting go that strengthens you"

So why am I listening to Gee?

Got You Back

2009-11-20T15:29:00.003+08:00

It's weird. I found myself in front of Hwa Chong International. Pretty damn weird why my legs brought me there. I would wait for her to come out almost every Wednesday, we would take a bus to any random mall and window-shop, occasionally giving in to our heart's desires and splurging on random stuff like Muscle Cream. Yes we really bought it.

All I could do was to get the hell out of there before anyone could call the guards for trespassing. I took a long, long walk. I sat down at a bus-stop and just stayed there. Thinking. From where I was, I could pretty much see everything. The world. Well, not really, but that's what it felt like. So much sky, so many buildings. Thousands of windows, a million lights. Life going on everywhere.

When you're watching someone, it feels as if you and him were the only people in the world. No matter how far apart you are.

I looked at the road in front of me. How long would it take for me to run out and get hit? Five seconds? I remember the old story, that if you dream you're falling and you hit the ground in the dream, you're dead.

I had that dream once. I decided to hit the ground.

Woke up fine anyway.

I found myself thinking of atomic bombs. They said that Little Boy looked like a garbage can with fins on it. She told me that the whole point of modern weapons were that you don't have to see the people you kill. That they can be a million miles away and die as soon as you press a button. That is plain scary. Someone so far away from you could be so dangerous.

But what freaks me out is that bombs aren't so huge anymore. Now they come in suitcases, briefcases. You could walk past someone in the street and see them with a backpack and you think, "Okay, the world is gonna end right now" Paranoid huh?

Enough of death talk. It's been a while since I called her. Ever since the fight we maintained radio-silence. Well, mainly because she went to America without telling me. I forgot how scary it would be to call up one of your best friends when you're in the middle of a fight. You dial her number, and all of a sudden she picks up and you're like "Okay.. what do I say now?"

It's funny how you can go along thinking everything's fine, it's just life throwing a mood and it's not big deal. And then something happens and you realize it isn't life after all.

At some point we know it's time. The moment you realize you actually can't stay battling with your friend forever and you have to get away from her, away from it all.

And that's when you know you might as well go.
Because thinking about it only makes it worse.

When she comes back, I wanna ask her:"What do you do when things change and it sucks, but there's nothing you can do about it? What do you do when you miss someone?"

I have a feeling she would know the answer.

To be honest, the only time I acted like my real self is online, and around her. We would act like we're part of the UES and go around ION 'ooh-ing' and 'aah-ing' at overpriced items, even though we could afford it. We would act like a pair of bitches and randomly pick someone to glare at for the rest of the MRT ride. but what i missed most was how she would always spare time to listen about me and my ramblings about Jay. It's a pretty daunting task.

And now, I'm all alone.

What You Mean To Me

2009-11-12T17:35:00.002+08:00

You and me made lots of memories, you and them too
But some things can't last forever
But I'll hold them inside
I won't let them go
No never

So I'm writing you a letter to catch you up on what you've missed
Won't leave out any detail 'cus I want you to know the best
And I'll sign it with a heart or maybe two
An X an O a way to show how much that I have really missed you
And I'll draw a picture with my box of color pens
A giant wave of water with seven people holding hands
And at the bottom in too small of print to read
I'll tell you just how much
You really mean to me

Oh a lot has gone on since you left
But I'm still going strong
But it's harder without you
Baby I need you just for a little while

Won't you write me a letter so I can catch up on what I've missed
Don't leave out any detail 'cus I want to know the best

And sign it with a heart or maybe two
An X an O a way to show
That you have really missed us too
And draw a picture with your box of color pens
It doesn't matter what it is no
Just show me that you care
And at the bottom in too small of print to read
I hope that you can tell us that we mean as much to you
As you mean to me
-kudos to fellow chinggu for co-writing the song with me [she's in US now LOL]

It Happened In September.

2009-11-11T15:55:00.002+08:00

I was sitting beside the toilet bowl just now. Not that I had a choice. It was just in case I felt the urge to puke again. It was a lie when I told my parents I puked because the food was weird. I forced myself to. I have no idea why. I thought I overcame this symptom two years ago, but old habits die hard I suppose.

As disgusting as this seems, its true. I was wiping my eyes, you know, when you vomit tears come out. But then I realized I was crying. Positively bawling. I don't know why, it was as if all the memories of the happy times come rushing back. I mean, yeah, I have more happy times now. But I missed the times when I wake up each day looking forward to a new episode of Wild Bunny.

But the truth is that he's gone isn't it...

I would do anything, ANYTHING to see those pink boxers again.
I would do anything, ANYTHING to see his diamond studs again.
I would do anything, ANYTHING to see him asking 'What time is it?' again.

Goodness me, your princess is crying.

I never said Goodbye to him. Not yet. And I'm not going to. I know I'm living in denial, but that's just the best way for me to live on. I know I'm never going to sleep at peace every night, I know things are never going to be the same anymore.

Yet here I am, contradicting myself. I clutching at every single strand of memory there is of him. No one can match up to him, leader of the Wild Bunny force. I tell myself each and every day, "He will come back, I'm sure he will" but hell, no matter how many times I say those words, I know they won't happen. Not in a long run anyway.

Its hard loving him. Its hard forgetting him too.My friends tease and taunt him about me, his fans include me in all their conversations about him. Either way, he can't get out of my life. Never.

I don't have a closing statement to this post, for once. So let's just end with this.

What time is it now? I said, what time is it now?

Preview

2009-11-05T17:30:00.003+08:00

Preview of my re-edited Stay Together lyrics.

Stay Together
You told me that you’re gonna do it like its your last time
I thought that you would go on till this world ends, baby
Hatred follows your each and every footstep
Still whatever you do you cant run away, oh no
But I guess that hate was way too much for you to take so
When you left all I could say to you was to please just go

Damn if I could I would have just stopped you
Those tears gathering in your eyes
If I could I would have got to you,
Maybe stopped you from going
Make you come back here, right by my side

[CHORUS]
I just want you to know
That I love you so much and
It still scares me when I look in your eyes
I just figured out that I can never live without you
So are you going to leave me and just gonna let this go?

You told me it was goodbye
Promise me you will remember
We got to stay together
Kuhz I know that I cant let you go
My heart is breaking
I love you forever
You told me it was goodbye
Promise me you will remember
We got to stay together
Kuhz I know that I will always wait for you

Just stop where you are
I’m sure you know that right?
-------------------------------------
Sucks ass. Hmm.

Been real.

Perfect .

2009-11-05T14:52:00.004+08:00

Great. This is just fucking great. Yeah, sure, I don't mind the auto-tuning.. but cutting his face out of the album? You might as well stab my heart with the sharpest dagger in the world. I don't know what to do anymore. After all we've done, you decided to be cruel, heartless, or maybe that's just the way you were born, and you ignored the fact that YOU yourself has said that he was still under the group. And see, you double-faced liar, you sure have a twisted tongue. I give you a standing ovation, for being the most manipulative bitch I've ever known.

This is just too surreal for me. There is so much a fourteen year-old girl could take. Hell, I'm already missing trainings, all three types, due to my leg. Then, I'm freaking going away. And now.. daebak. Truly, daebak.

Only a few nights ago, I actually had a real dream about him. He was wearing his Again & Again outfit, the one in orange and black. I don't know, maybe it was during Halloween. He was on stage. But before the performance started, his hair was like the one he had in Seattle. Close-cropped and stuff. Before he started to perform, he put on this wig, the wig that was exactly like his hair in his normal 2PM days. I don't know, somehow, I felt that this dream had an underlying message.

I can honestly tell you, that I set the website as my homepage. When I switched on my PC, the time was ticking, it was approaching. I was apprehensive. What if, when the time stopped, something bad was going to happen? Oh boy, it did. It sure did.

So Mr. JYP, I would truly like to thank you for being you. Because, oh well, its not like you can help it anyway.

been real.

K bye.

Christmas Lights

2009-10-14T18:19:00.001+08:00

You can actually die from inhaling 200 balloons worth of helium.

Imagine you saying your last words in a squeaky voice..

that thought just amuses me.

A lot.

Oh whatever. Go to hell.

When Nothing Is Ever Enough

2009-10-03T14:51:00.004+08:00

Some people don't know what privacy means.
Some people don't know what 'leaving people alone' means.
Some people just don't seem to have a heart; a fully functional, working one.

I know reporters are 'die-hard', they would do anything, ANYTHING, to get their jobs done. But to the extent of showing the exact location of his house? A bit too much, you think? But of course, of course, in their eyes, it's nothing. How would they like it if I place a big-ass camera crew in front of their house, while they snoop around and do their dirty work? Trust me, I know about all the drama behind the cameras.

Which is where, we, fans, come in. We fight in a rational, discreet manner. We do not start riots and World Wars, we just show our support, our care, and most of all, our love. And yet, we get branded as 'hardcore'. This does not reflect well on us fans. It would be pretty amazing if you delusional reporters correct the mistake that you made, but hell, the news is already out. Now people are gonna swarm his doorstep. Where is he going to rest now? Hell, netizens made his leave his country, and now reporters make him leave his house?

I can't believe this. Not a single bit of it. Everything seems like it should belong in some A-List drama, and we're the characters inside. Life is just a play, and we've got our own different stages. Sometimes, our stories clash, and problems arise. Sometimes, they get solved, most of the time, they don't. I honestly don't know what else to say anymore. Because this is a war where the winner would be judged by Him.

Personally, I think that the media industry is too much. They take things too seriously, they are like birds of prey, circling around, sniffing out gossip like a couple of bloodthirsty pirates.

Till then,
I'm outta here.
GD-Babyism.

[Take one, two steps, and there you are. Wherever you wanna be]

This Is For You

2009-10-02T16:02:00.002+08:00

I've got one more exam and I'm done.

Dead and Gone. So till then,entertain yourselves with this song and this poem I wrote, inspired by reading Net of Jewels by Ellen Gilchrist. Its dedicated to him, and there's meaning in each and every line of the poem. Enjoy.

Poem Of September:

The rain,the rain is kind to come

It sings its only song, dumb, dumb,dumb

It sings that life is not always what it seems

And love, my love is but a dream

Autumn comes as I sit and stare

At that tiny little four-inch square

A photograph of a distant dream I had

Like someone crazy, I am entirely mad

I guess there might this life out side this dark and dreary place

Where sit down and stare everyday

At the long-lost face of a man I loved

Called Park Jay

-GD Babyism.

I know I am just not myself right now. I picked up bad habits ever since, and it is slowly deteriorating my life. But I don't mind. I don't care anymore. This may be over the top, but fuck what you think. I don't give a freakin shit. And no one tries to hold themselves from saying his name or anything related in front of me anymore. They don't try to hold themselves back, just shoot it out of their wide, insensitive mouths. But oh well, there's only so much I can do. And hating them is just not on my list.

You know, before I entered my secondary school, I had a list of friends I just HAD to be friends with. First is someone who is an IT freak, one should be a Math whiz, a Science geek, a MT linguist, a sports leader, a good writer and someone plain smart. But guess what? In life, you can either befriend the smartest kids in school, or be friends with the most random, loveable, happy people and reap even more benefits.

I thoguht now would be a good time to thank my friends, for walking together with me throughout my life in secondary school. I hope our friendship will last long, even if we get into different classes next year. I know this year wasn't as smooth-sailing as we would have liked it to be. But if I could start my life over, I would still choose to be friends with all of you; no matter how weird, crazy, childish, plain creepy you guys are, I thank you.

Lee Myung Hee.

Smile Again.

2009-09-15T21:27:00.004+08:00

Fine. I officially smiled again when I remembered that he actually brought along his notebook AND his mouse back to Seattle. This sucks. Really, it does. I couldn't seem to find enough strength to go to school on Monday, but thanks to my friends, I managed. I went home early today though, I was feeling sick kuhz.. yeah, whatever. So here I am, not caring about life, being the delusional loser I am. I'm becoming an LBR. Gah.

And fine, I hate to say this, but I really agree with Paris Hilton's quote: "Dress cute wherever you go, because life is too short to blend in" Its true, you know. There really is more to life than just to live. The world is one huge unexplored stage, and we can't always stay in the limelight. Maybe that's why I've been translating loads of poems these days. God, I am trying my best to be the same 'ol me, but it is really hard. How could I, after this cataclysm happened? And great, my form teacher wants to talk to me tomorrow. The Talk.

I've been listening to English songs these days, and some of the lyrics are really meaningful. I mean, yeah, I've gotta make out what they were actually singing, but when I found out the lyrics, I was thinking, "Hell yeah, you got me at this line".

So, yeah, cheers to Jay. Thanks to what happened, I REALLY pray hard now. Like, seriously.

And to all Hottests around this globe:
When it falls apart
And you're feeling lost
All your hope is gone
Don't forget to
Hold On.

I've been telling people, "Two more weeks, give me two more weeks to recover" But I figured out, two weeks, two months, two years, and I'll still carry around that scar in my heart. It's never going to be healed, but it's not the end either. Because there's always some beauty even in the saddest moments. Believe in yourself, keep the faith, and hold on. Together, we're going to make this right again, all of us Hottests. Though I doubt my dad would fancy me pasting Post-Its around the shop.

And this if for Jay/Park Jay/Park Jae Bum:
I know that you're the on that's feeling the worst right now. We Hottests are selfish to think that you might come back. Because we are clueless about what's really happening. So I'm going to take this time and apologize on behalf of everyone, for making you feel like ten loads of shit. But seriously Jay, not only your fans are saving your career, even stars are. Without you Wild Bunny becomes tame. Without you, it's 9 Points Out of Ten. I finally plucked up the courage to listen to You Might Come Back yesterday. And bless the irony. Who knew that you singing the words 'You might come back' so passionately actually came true? Only now, its the reverse. We want you to come back. but you might no want to. So like I said, we love you, we want you, and we'll wait for you.

Lovelovelove(?)
Lee Myung Hee.

Don't cry, don't say goodbye.

Facing The Thing Called Truth

2009-09-10T17:01:00.002+08:00

When you love someone and they break your heart
Don't give up on love, have faith, restart
Just hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on

When it falls apart and you're feeling lost
All your hope is gone, don't forget to hold on
Hold on

The rundown on how I officially ended my life. I remembered the night before everything started.I happily finishing up chapter nine of Some Like it Secret.The last thing I remembered writing was about Jae Bum and me becoming friends in front of my townhouse next to the 63 Building. I went to sleep with a smile.The next day, I had to go to Kallang. I was on allkpop when I first found out about the incident. I dismissed it, thinking it would cool down, somehow. So i chatted with Soo Mi, planning to make a trailer for the fanfiction. Little did I know that the situation wasworsening with every word I typed.

Flash forward, the day I really lost everything. 080909. I could hardly breathe when I read the news.I was shaking so much, even my cousin pointed it out, and she was usually ignorant. I didn't even manage the counter that day. I sat inside the room, clutching my latop, frnatically refreshing 2ONEDAY's twitter page for updates and signing up for every petition i could get my hands on. That day was the day I cried and lost control. My cousin tried to calm me down, saying that thsi was all to make him more popular. But it was obviously not true. I held back my tears in front of the customers. But when the news came out thathe was at the airport, I really lost it. I stopped working all together and tweeted like hell.

When the plane took off, I lost my equilibrium.I was stumbling around everywhere,I couldn't see straight.I know most girls would go home and cry their hearts out, but I dragged myself to Leisure Park and bought everything that reminded me of him. Dried mangoes, Shikhae, I emptied out almost half of Sol Mart. The amount I spent I didnt care. I was losing control of myself,and it was scary.I almost ran out of the shop to hail a cab to take me straight to the airport. I set my phone time as Seattle, thinking it would make me feel closer to him.But with every step I take, the further he slips away. I really hated my position I held that very day.

Wanting to help, but helpless.

Once I reached home,I forced myself to smile in front of my mom.But she noticed the dark rings around my eyes.I ran into my room, locked the door, and cried.Usually I cried silently. But that time, I had to stuff the pillow into my mouth to muffle the sounds coming out.I crept into my sleeping room a little after eleven. I tried to sleep, but I couldnt. I wept all the way till one 06 am. The next day was no better. When I saw the fanvideo of him reaching Seattle, I cried so much, my heart telling me that somehow, he wont come back. I refused to listen to You Might Come Back.I blocked out all 2PM's songs from my mp3/PC. I lcoked myself in the room most of the day. I cried, but mostly, I thought. I thought how happy he would be reunited with his family.

I still never smiled though. I tried smiling in front of the mirror, but it was so obvious my eyes were saying something else.I started to pray again. I didnt know what else I could do. I tried to block him out, but suddenly,
everything reminded me of him.I was flipping through the latest issue of female, when I stopped at one page and broke down. They were doing a style section that looked just like his I Hate You outfit.

There is nothing else for me to do.
Moving on seems so hard.
So I'll just hope.
& Wait.

Insane.

2009-09-07T08:52:00.003+08:00

Korean netizens just make me wanna puke sometimes. I'm sorry if this is a bad start to what is going to lead to a whole essay, but I am simply stating the truth. I am sure by now almost everyone who is a K-Popper is aware of the controversy between idols and netizens. Let me get straight to the point, and by that, I mean let's go to the beginning. No, you dont have to go back to the Big Bang, or the day you were born, but rather, on September 5th.

2PM's leader Park Jae Bum has sparked outrage and anger among Korean fans all because of his myspace comments. Fine, I can understand that he may have sounded quite harsh and conceited, but get this, THE COMMENTS WERE DATED 2005-2007! If you have brains and something called common sense and maybe something called a calendar, you would know that this is the year 2009. TWO THOUSAND NINE. What does this mean? This means that those comments were IN THE PAST.

You know, there is something called 'change' and 'adaptation'. My dear readers, let me tell you, when I first moved in 2005, I freaking hated everything about Woodlands. I hated my school, I hated not having my old friends, I hated EVERYTHING. I would go to school everyday and just stare, occasionally cursing this Australian guy called Jeremy because he was annoying, and I would go home and train. I thought that working harder would get me out of that school. But hell no, I stayed put. So I changed my tactic, I forced myself to adapt. I forced myself to like Woodlands, and here I am now,a good four years later, perfectly fine. So Koreans, why don't you try to put yourselves in Jae Bum's shoes for once? And to Korean-Americans, why can't you empathize? Didn't you go through the same process? sure, Jae Bum may have made it public that he hated Korea, but didn't he apologize? And he didn't say sorry once, hell no, he said it four times. And I'm sure in his heart he's very apologetic. He was immature at the time he wrote those comments, and obviously, he has changed.

So Koreans, are you willing to forget all those particularly choice Again&Again performances, those amazing acrobatics, all those quirky comments made my them, just because of a few worthless comments? Judging from how you are reacting now, I don't think so. As a human, you have to attempt to rationalize the dichotomy between personal emotions and reality. You have to LET GO.

Okay, you Koreans love 2NE1 right? So, why can't you act like YOU DON'T CARE? Just for once, can't you people not overreact like a bunch of immature, senseless kids? Why can't you guys close one eye and FORGIVE AND FORGET? Hell, you even bashed Woo Young's cyworld just because he wanted to support his fellow member? Isn't the saying "One for all, all for one" known worldwide? Heck, even me and my friends use it as our motto. If one falls, the rest would be there to be a support.

I'm sorry if I sound very harsh and rude, there's only so much a fourteen-year old adolescent could say. Unlike you Koreans, I was brought up to look at reality in different points of view. I am not attacking the Koreans, I am just very unhappy with their actions. I seriously find writing a petition to stop 2PM's activities and kicking Jae Bum out of a reality program too over-the-top. Hey, G-Dragon has done worse things. He said "Shit" on TV, and did ya remember the "I Love Sex?" badges? So why aren't you stopping Big Bang's activities? Not that I want you to, I'm just pointing out an example. Trust me, don't waste your time. Go support DBSK instead.

written by GD-Babyism.

as if it's the last time.

2009-08-13T15:38:00.000+08:00

Have you ever felt as is nothing in this world really mattered? All that you care about is you and your dreams? Because that’s how I’m feeling right now. I feel as if everything can just slip away from me and I wont care. Perhaps its because of my perspective, perhaps its because of my feelings. But right here, right now, I feel so connected with my lifelong dream that I’m prepared to sacrifice anything, everything just so I can reach the top. But with every sacrifice comes tears. That I have learnt, the hard way.

Jae Bum once said during Hot Blood that he’s going to do it as if it’s the last time. I’m going to chase my dream as if its my last time too. I wont let the chance fall away from me. Not again. Perfection. That’s what I aim to achieve. And now, after that talk, I’m all prepared to pack up my bags and leave. But like I said earlier on, sacrifices are not easy. They never are. My friends, the ones that I see everyday, the ones I smile at even though I’m suffering, they don’t know about this. They don’t know when I might just leave. They don’t know when’s our last time.

From now on I promise to be a better person to my friends. Because if I left behind a trail of tears, I may never see happiness again. Because if I left behind angst, I would live the rest of my life in hurt and pain. I won’t do that. I won’t be selfish and I won’t be a fool. Period.

I suppose I really should start accepting people for who they are. Because in the near future, I would be stuck at the bottom of the ladder, and I would have to crawl myself back to the top, with no one to help me. I’m going to be different. Different.

GD Baby-ism™

[That burning passion, that flame of desire. Its in my heart]

Never Ending Story

2009-07-29T15:59:00.000+08:00

I seriously felt like cutting up Adam's face just now.
Just because he reminded me of Jay Z. [Nah, not the rapper]
But SERIOUSLY! Gawd.. that smirk...
I'm going to bring a knife with me everywhere.

And seriously, who the fuck needs 12++ rehearsal for one six minute performance?!
Right. I do. I have no idea why that old geezer is such a perfectionist.
Tae Yang's a perfectionist too but at least he's hot. This man is... [shudders]
This is stupid. Blogger is stupid.

I hope that Z aint gonna read my blog. He said he wanted to. Whatevs.
I seriosuly have the urge to splurge. I have no idea why. My hand needs more excercise in taking out cards lol.
I recently bought this gorgeous Valentino wraparound skirt, and guess what?
Lee Hyo Ri has it too. Will post pictures as soon as Blogger stops being such a retard.

I dreamt that I was Harry Potter.
Shut up, I know its weird. But dreams gotta suit the dreamer eh?
My Viewty is still insane. It cant play WMA files shatttttt.

This video never fails to crack me up. AHHAAAA, Kwonnie sounded like French [Heh, and I'm supposed to know better]
And whatsup with Bus Driver Woo Young and his Fergie fetish? LOL, nawt unfunny.

Okay then, I suppose I need to study now. AND AND AND I was bored in class
so I drew myself a watch that only showed the time 2PM. AHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAA.

Leaving you in a cloud of Chanel No.19,
GD Baby.

[I try not to think of you anymore
In my mind, you're the bad guy]

Let's Not...

2009-07-27T17:04:00.000+08:00

1st June to 26th July.
56 days, no more no less.
Let's not keep this up anymore.
Let's just end this before anyone gets hurt.
I'm scared.

Terribly frightened of getting my heart crushed all over again.
So let's just break that promise,because when we made it,
our hearts weren't included.

I didn't expect love,
and yet you gave it to me.
Take it back,
take it back.

Goodbye, my love.
No, I dont love you.
Let's just end this amicably.
That's the best way we can learn.
I'm trying to hold back the tears.
But my tear ducts aren't working.
My teardrops keep falling.

I suppose its because of this seperation.
I suppose its because its hopeless for this to continue.

I'm stuck in the middle.
Tangled in a web of sorrow and confusion.
Its best for you to leave.
Love, confusion and despair.
They feel the same.
Yours truly,
GD Baby-ism.

The End .

2009-05-21T16:04:00.002+08:00

That's it.
I'm on the verge of breaking down.
In fact, I think I already am.

It's not about love, no.
Friendship? Not that either.
Rather, it's about the loss of something,
something precious to me.

You gave it to me when I was still young,
I still remember your words, "Keep it well"
as you fixed it around my neck.

You're now not standing by me anymore.

It's gone.
Disappeared.
Just like that.

These days I roam around the streets aimlessly,
all life sucked out of me. To face the truth,
this few days were the saddest I've ever experienced.
After I found out the truth, everything came spiralling down,
crashing itself onto my life, making my life a debris.

I can't even trust those closest to me anymore.
And my heart was stabbed with a dagger all over again,
when she claimed my stories as 'nonsense',
because let's face it, no one really cares.

They pretend they care, for a few seconds,
and then they're gone. I've seen this trick more than once.
More than anyone in my whole lifetime, I've been deceived.
It's a miracle I even go to school. I could easily quit.
If I wanted to.

And I could have easily moved away. If I Wanted To.
I suppose that saying was really true after all,
"Love, it was the reason why I was once blind"

Looking again at this line, I smirk. How true it is.
I guess it's the right time to say good bye for now.

I'll end this post with a song, this song is special to me,
because only you know the true meaning of it.

[Don't say sorry, just accept it]

September 19

2009-03-31T19:16:00.003+08:00

Tears.

Those rivulets of water poured down my cheeks as I tread slowly on the ground.
I looked up. A dark, cloudy sky greeted me.

Rain.

Those pristine droplets of liquid from the sky fell down on my face.
Pitter Patter. Tears. Rain.
I sighed. A truly, sad sigh.
He left me exactly one month ago.

September 19. That fateful day, that very fateful day.

Its still raining.
When will my tears ever stop?
Drip Drop .

Death And Thereafter/Love

2009-03-10T18:13:00.003+08:00

D E A T H
Death is one who awaits for every soul
All of nature's child have feared this word
It will bring thee terror from head to sole
Centuries past, it had been told and heard

If one should conspire a sinful deed
Then death shall punish and take one away
And if nature is evil, death will breed
No matter where, one cannot end this day

It is destiny that all could foresee
Something that no one could hinder nor cheat
As frightful and dreadful as one can be
It is reality that one shall meet

Wherever life begins, there'd be an end
Death is a truth that a man cannot mend.

T H E R E A F T E R
Don’t cry for me, remember me, the way I used to be
Every time you close your eyes, I'll be all that you'll see
Don’t cry for me, imagine me, when the moon comes out tonight
That I'll be there, be with you, always by your side

Don’t cry for me, no more tears, just wipe your sorrow away
Don’t be sad for me, smile for me, I'm free from hurt and pain
Don’t cry for me, believe in me, your angel is alright
For you I'll be here waiting, in my castle in the sky

L O V E
With your love's warm caress
Take me to another place
Igniting fire in my soul
Staying forever in your embrace

Blend with my soul tonight
And let me breathe for you
Wrap my heart within yours
Melting one body, no more two

Pacifying our bodies needs
Losing myself in your kiss
Your touch leaving memories
Of our one night of bliss

Toxically yours,
GD Baby-ism

Artwork.

2009-03-10T15:43:00.002+08:00

Toxically yours,
GD Baby

Always There ?

2009-03-08T17:13:00.002+08:00

I sometimes wonder.
Will all the things I treasure
Disappear ?
F
O
R
EVER

I sometimes muse
Will all the things I love
Fly away like a
Dove ?

Will my friends and family
Leave me?

And will he ever take the love away ,
and make me see all over again ?

I Love You .
Will You Always Be There For Me ?
Forever ?

Love, it was the reason why I was once blind .

Yours truly,
GD Baby-ismatic

A New Start .

2009-02-11T15:12:00.002+08:00

Hi everyone. I'm here, but I'm not me

anymore (I'm not possessed ok). I.. feel different.

Better than how I felt for the past few days.

Much much better. I was pretty caught up with all the

stress and tension around me, I dont think about myself like I always do.

I dumped my posse. And I dont feel so suffocated anymore. I guess its the pressure. But hey, we're still friends, right? I mean, its not as if we're life partners or anything. I used to think that my friends in RS are much more treasure-able than my primary school buds.. but now.. I'm not so sure anymore. Yeah, I mean, I'm not so valuable (I'm aware) no one gives a fcuk if I suddenly drop dead or something. So just move on and live life. I am aware of my imperfections, but hey, if I cant change it, who can?

Like what I mentioned to a certain kid yesterday, even if we keep making up after fighting, we're bound to fight another time, so we'll just land nowhere.

So, to me, friends are minorities in life. Its you. YOU have to learn to trust yourself. (When I say YOU it actually means me).

Ok, back to me-time. I went to Changi Airport today for LJ.It was mainly a yawn and laugh added up together to give you a jungle jiggle joo. We fooled around, I just followed suit so they wont like.. harass me.

And yes, I will end my post.

Toodles Chyeah?

You’re my melody; I’ll perform you, on & on,

You’re my song, my life’s soundtrack,

I love you, for you brighten up my life’s stage,

I’ll continue to sing you, you’re my song

SHINee-Last Gift (English Lyrics)

2008-11-14T11:57:00.004+08:00

HI!! Haha, I was bored outta my head, so I decided to translate the song I was listening to, which just so happens to be SHINee's Last Gift. GOD, I love that song dang it. Its so touching. Haha yeah so I decided to translate it so others can also feel the sensitivity of this song. Its also my blog song,so you dont have to download it or anything^^ Ok then, here goes!

P/S: The music player kinds of makes the words hard to read, so highlight them to make your eyes happy!!
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SHINee-마지막 선물 (Last Gift-In My Room Prelude)

I don’t want to open my eyes.
Truthfully, I can’t believe it.
Because this is the last time we are saying goodbye.
It feels so strange.

I can only sigh.
I’m afraid and my heart is closed.
How could I believe you when you said goodbye out of a sudden?

I don’t know why
I cant move on

My feet refuses to move from this spot.
This day is like a lie.
A part of my heart hurts so much.

The ring that I placed on your finger, has coldly been returned back to my hands.
As well as my heart.
My last gift, is this separation.

Are these only my memories?
When I first met you it was like a scene from a movie.
Why wont my thoughts leave me alone?
Am I the only one suffering?

I don’t know why
I cant move on

I feel like you will come back.
Could you be regretting it now?
I still cant leave this spot.

The ring that I placed on your finger, has coldly been returned back to my hands.
As well as my heart.
My last gift..
Since when did we drift apart?
From where did it go wrong?
My heart really refuses to let you go.
Is this really the end?
The thing that’s called Goodbye.

This is hard for me, like my farewell.
My heart refuses to follow my words.
In order to forget you, I had to make some unforgiving promises.
So that I can bear with it..

The ring that I placed on your finger, has coldly been returned back to my hands.
Along with my heart.
My last gift is this heartbreak.

Since when did we drift apart?
My heart really refuses to let you go.
Is this really the end?
You’re my one last love.

Translation credits to: me!/ Lee Myung Hee/ Gdbaby

Dedicated to those whose hearts are lonely. Especially a few of my friends. (You should know who you are ok) And of course, SHINee Fans. I hope all of you will credit me if you are posting this somewhere else, kuhz its obviously the right thing to do.

Ok then, toodles chyeah?
*The Last Gift from me to you is utter misery*